Howdy,
I have been here for 85 days, and I can safely say that the “honeymoon phase” is over. What is the honeymoon phase? Wellllll basically you start off your trip feeling like you basically have a 9 month vacation and you’re going to be exploring every day and going out and having the time of your life at all times. Turns out, as every kid gets warned: this isn’t the case. The first weeks are full of excitement because everything is new, but once that wears off, you begin to feel very tired ALL the time, because being forced to do everything in a language that you don’t think in is CASI impossible. This is only remedied by staying busy. Unfortunately, in the afternoons, not much is going on, so you find yourself thinking and making yourself get very homesick…great.
On top of that, it is the holiday season, when all of your relatives in America are all together doing American things (Thanksgiving was KILLER) and you’re in a country where Thanksgiving actually doesn’t exist…I made a thanksgiving dinner for my host fam, but even so, I felt extremely left out and missed my family more than anything. It is very hard knowing that everyone you care about is having the time of their lives without you…
I heard that our fam doesn’t like putting up Christmas trees, so I guess we aren’t really doing that this year. It kinda makes me very sad because everyone keeps sending me photos of their trees but other than that I forget that Christmas is in 19 days. I wish we decorated here but maybe that’s something else that you have to get used to when being in an exchange program.
At this point, I have about 7 months left, and I haven’t even finished 3. oof.
Honestly, somewhere I actually believed that studying abroad would be easier than everyone says. Turns out, this isn’t actually the case. I feel perpetually alone and very very sad. Maybe it’ll go away soon or maybe seeing my actual parents for Christmas (!!!!!!!!!) will ease the homesickness.
I’m not sure what the answer is, but this just goes to show that the life of an exchange student isn’t all fun and new adventures. I’m learning a lot, but sometimes I have to learn that new cultures means missing out on your own. If anyone has any advice for homesickness or ways to initiate a productive dialogue with a host family without causing more problems, PLEASE let me know! This weird limbo of a place makes you always feel out of place or like a third wheel. It is normal for host families and students to get in arguments or fights, but no one really explains how to go about fixing them. Is there a way? Does it get better? Will you eventually feel like you belong? I guess I’ve been feeling a little lost and could use some help getting out of this situation. So if you have any advice, help?
Peace,
~Parker Grove
